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Chapter One: Left Behind

It was a normal but very warm day at Wammy’s House.
All the children were studying very hard, playing in and outside or just sitting in their rooms doing something on their own.
I was one of the few children who sat in my room, I was playing  Pokémon on my DS.
Ever since Mello left the orphanage I tend to play too much on my DS just to keep my mind off Mello.
I seriously really missed my best friend.
Mello had always been there for me, day or night.
If I had one of my nightmares again and woke up in the middle of the night, I could always wake Mello up to talk to him about it, or just sit there calming down and then go back to sleep.
I also could have a lot of fun with him, like stealing chocolate in the middle of the night from the kitchen, or sitting outside while Mello was eating chocolate and complaining about Near and thinking about plans to beat him, and me playing on my DS and replying once in a while.
Yeah, those were the good days..
Now, life is just kinda boring.
Every day is the same, getting up, school, homework, dinner, sleep, and playing on my DS.
I always hoped Mello would call me, or send a letter or something, but never have I heard anything from him again.
I wonder if he’s still alive, for all I know, he could be hit by a car or something..
But it’s still Mello we’re talking about, he’s always been very strong and could take of himself, no, I’m sure he’s fine, just eating chocolate and bossing someone else around.
To be honest, I used to be that someone, I always complained about being Mello’s “dog”, but now, I really want to be that someone again if that means I can be by his side again.

I sighed.
“Man stop thinking about it, he’s not coming back, so suck it up”, I mumbled to myself while I litted a cigarette.

I walked to the window and looked outside.
Memories came back again..
The big tree we always sat in, and tied Near at once, we left him there around 7 o’clock in the evening, and the next morning around 9 Watari found him, we totally forgot to untie him, big trouble we always were in back then, the gate where Mello walked through when he left and never came back, the grass where we lay on almost every evening, and where I almost kissed him when he fell asleep one time.

I turned off my game.
I didn’t really felt like playing games right now, I had that same damn feeling again in my stomach.

It was time for dinner, so I made my way to the dinner room where a lot of other children were already eating.
I didn’t really felt much like eating, which wasn’t really normal for me because I’m a big fan of food.
I kept wondering if Mello would maybe call me if he needed me to do his dirty work again.
This time I wouldn’t complain before accepting the job, I would accept it before he could even finish asking it.

“Matt, is something wrong? You haven’t eaten anything yet?”, Watari asked me nicely.
I looked at him and felt tears coming in my eyes.

“No, there’s nothing wrong, I’m just not that hungry”, I tried to sound as normal as possible.
I was sure Watari wouldn’t buy it, but I also knew that he would stop asking about it because he knew something was bothering me.

Watari frowned.
“Matt, my door is always open, you can always come talk to me”, He said to me with a smile.

I just nodded, I knew that if I’d try to speak, I couldn’t hold back the tears.
He placed his hand on my shoulder and smiled, and I smiled back.

An hour later I went outside, I didn’t ate anything, I just looked around and thought about my future here at Wammy’s House.
Maybe I should leave too, I mean, I’m old enough to take care of myself, although Mello used to do that, he gave the orders, and I followed them.
Sometimes it would get me into trouble, but I didn’t mind, because it was with Mello.

I lay down on the grass and looked to the sky.
A small smile appeared on my face, and a tear fell down on my cheek.

“Mello..”, I whispered while I closed my eyes and fell asleep.

The next morning I woke up from all the noises I heard other children making while they played soccer or were laughing with their friends.

I stood up and looked at my watch.
“Oh fuck no! I’m already way to late for class!”, I yelled while I ran to my room, grabbed my bag and ran to the classroom.

I knocked on the door and when I heard someone say that I could come in, I opened the door and walked to my seat and sat down.
I could feel everyone looking at me, but I didn’t want to look around to check if they were indeed looking, because I just knew they were.

“Matthew, can you please explain why you are late?”, the teacher asked me.

I hated when someone called me Matthew, I named myself Matt, just Matt, not Matthew!

“I’m sorry madam, I fell asleep outside, and woke up a few minutes ago, so I quickly went to my room to get my bag, and I also didn’t made my homework for today because I had other things on my mind, but I promise I’ll make it today and I will give it to you first thing in the morning, I promise!”, I said without breathing.

The teacher gave me a strange look.
“Well, I guess it’s okay if you give it to me tomorrow, but I want you to have a little chat with Watari after your last class”.

A chat with Watari? Why? Did I do something wrong?
All day I kept thinking about it, it wouldn’t get out of my mind.

After school I made my way to Watari’s office.
I felt kinda nervous, I mean, going there without knowing why.
Me and Mello went to his office a thousand times in the past, but we always knew why.

Watari opened the door and smiled at me while I walking in and sat down.

“Welcome Matt, do you have any idea why you are here?”, he asked me with a smile while he walked to the chair behind his desk.
“Not really, I guess because I didn’t made my homework for any of the classes today”, I replied a little mumbling, but I did knew why now, I knew, and Watari also knew damn well that I knew why, he gave me that same smile that he always gives me when I think about Mello.

Watari sat down and looked at me, it was like he was trying to read my mind, it was kinda freaking me out a little.

“You have to forget him Matt”, Watari spoke after a while.
I looked at him a little confused first, but then a anger look appeared on my face.

“What?”, I said to him almost sounding like Mello when someone didn’t do what he told that person to do.

“I know you’re still thinking about Mello, but you have to forget him, I know he was your best friend, but it has already been a year, and he haven’t contacted you, me, or anyone else at Wammy’s House since he left the orphanage, you are left behind by him, and you just have to accept that fact”, Watari said calmly, he was trying to keep me calm saying it like that, but he was just saying I should focus more on being like L because I now was number two and his successor.

“First of all, he still is my best friend, and he will always be my best friend, and second, I know for sure he will contact me, I know he hasn’t forgotten about me!”, I yelled at Watari while I walked away and slammed the door behind me.

I ran to my door and fell down on my bed.
Anger, sadness, hope, a lot of feelings I fell all of the sudden.

I took off my goggles and wiped away the tears.

After a few minutes I stood up and ran outside to the tree we used to sit in.
I started digging in the ground, and took out a little box me and Mello buried.

I smiled while I opened it with the key only me and Mello had.

We called it the ‘memories of our friendship-box’ or something, we putted stuff in it that reminded us of our friendship.
I took out a photo of me and Mello we secretly made.
It was when we were burying the box.

I smiled at the photo remembering that day.

“Mello, I know you haven’t forgot me”, I said out loud to myself  “Please haven’t forgot me”, I whispered
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